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Ricordi o pensi?

Qualche tempo fa, durante un PNL Practitioner, Richard Bandler disse una frase che mi è rimasta scolpita in mente: “Life is happening and if you spend your time remembering instead of thinking, you’re going in the wrong direction” (che tradotta suona così: “la vita sta accadendo e se spendi il tuo tempo a ricordare anziché pensare, stai andando nella direzione sbagliata”).

Spesso mi chiedono: “cos’è la Programmazione Neuro Linguistica?”. Io solitamente rispondo che è una disciplina che ti aiuta a PENSARE in modo più furbo.

Infatti tante volte ci incasiniamo con pensieri stupidi e inutili, molti dei quali derivano da eventi passati e che ci impediscono di vivere al meglio il presente e il futuro: “è accaduta quella cosa, quindi… sono sempre stato così… non sono mai stato capace di…”

Se hai già seguito un nostro corso di PNL mi avrai sicuramente sentito ripetere che la cosa bella del passato è che è successo (nota per i pract e master pract: uso appositamente l’ambiguità fonologica). Infatti ciò che mi piace di più della PNL e del coaching è che non sono interessati al passato, bensì al futuro della persona.

Credo infatti che il nostro lavoro da coach, tramite la Pnl o qualunque altro strumento, abbia l’obiettivo di aiutare le persone ad allargare i loro orizzonti per programmare un futuro degno di essere vissuto e decisamente invitante.

Mi ricordo un amico che una volta mi disse: sai perché il parabrezza di un’auto è molto più grande rispetto allo specchietto retrovisore? Perché devi passare più tempo a guardare avanti invece che indietro!

Domanda: hai in mente una situazione che sai già che ti creerà disagio non appena ricapiterà nel futuro? Ad esempio quando rivedrai quella persona, quando ti ritroverai in quel contesto, quando sarai in quel posto sai già che ci starai male?

Bene, se lo puoi prevedere ora significa che lo stai semplicemente PROGRAMMANDO! Come dice sempre Richard Bandler “la delusione richiede una pianificazione adeguata” .

Se puoi prevedere oggi che quella cosa ti metterà a disagio, significa che cambiando il tuo modo di pensare o percepire quella situazione, puoi cambiare la sensazione collegata!

Come? Sottomodalità, Time Line, eliminazione di ancore negative (se ce ne sono), swish, spinning feeling… insomma tutti gli strumenti che hai iniziato a imparare dal secondo giorno del PNL Practitioner.

Il problema è che il nostro istinto naturale più forte (ancora più di quello di sopravvivenza) è fare in modo che le cose siano familiari. Quindi, estremizzando il concetto, anche una brutta sensazione può essere più “accettabile” rispetto all’iniziare a fare qualcosa di diverso (e di più furbo): proprio perché il nuovo comportamento all’inizio ci risulta “strano” e sembra non appartenere al nostro carattere.

E se mi conosci sai che io non credo nel carattere: il carattere a mio modo di vedere non è nient’altro che una serie di abitudini che mettiamo in atto ogni giorno e non qualcosa di immutabile che non puoi cambiare (come molti pensano!).

Pensaci: non sei forse una persona diversa e con un carattere diverso rispetto a dieci anni fa o rispetto a quando eri bambino? Spero per te di sì! E sai come si chiama questo cambiamento? Apprendimento!

Infatti hai imparato cose che oggi ti fanno vivere meglio e hai creato delle nuove abitudini (che poi sono diventate familiari 🙂 ).

E così come hai fatto con queste, puoi iniziare a modificare tutti quei comportamenti o pensieri che oggi ancora ti limitano.

Ricordati, tutto è in costante cambiamento: accettalo velocemente e sfruttalo.

 

 

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